Liberty Forrest

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So...You Want to Give Up...And Then What?

You want to give up. Okay. I can relate to that. But first, be very clear about one thing: there's a big difference between 'giving up' and accepting that a situation will not be improved by your further efforts - and sometimes, to continue might even be to your detriment. The trick is in figuring out which is which.

If you do give up, what will happen? Or what won't happen? And can you live with whatever that is? Will it keep you stuck and not allow you to move forward? Or will it release you from a pointless situation or dream and allow you to move on?

If you're thinking about giving up, I'll bet you're really tired. I can relate to that, too. But is that the reason you want to give up? Being tired can distort your perception of things. It can make everything seem bigger, worse, heavier, more. So if you think that's a big part of why you want to give up, perhaps you could just take a rest instead.

Maybe you're feeling like one of those inflatable bowling-pin shaped things that kids punch in the face so it falls over, but then it springs back up. Maybe you've been punched so often, you're deflated, flattened, and you think you can't get back up yet again.

Yeah, I can relate to that, too.

So haul out the repair kit, patch up the tear, and get up again. I'm well aware that in doing so, you're essentially saying to the Universe, "Okay! Bring it on! Slam me again!"

But even if all you get is flattened one more time, you can still pop back up again. And again. And again. You just have to decide to do it. Yeah, I know you might have reached a point where you really don't want to, and you're asking me, why do you have to decide to do it?

It's quite simple really. Life sucks if you just stay there, deflated and miserable on the floor. If you get back up and try again, there is always the chance for improvement. If you don't, there isn't. Yes, you might get knocked down again but so what? It sucks, I know, but is that a good reason to stop trying? To accept that it sucks and sit there and complain about how miserable things are?

I guess that's your choice, but if you want to feel better, then you have to try again, until you are quite clearly shown that it's time to stop and do something else instead.

Sooner or later, the Universe will get bored with your refusal to give up. Or you'll learn to brace yourself for the punches and not get knocked down and then you'll be punching the air and yelling, "Checkmate!"

But at the minute, your king's in peril. Your pawns are almost gone. And you've lost a bishop and a rook. Yet you've still got your queen.

Do you really expect life to be easy? Okay, so maybe you're thinking it didn't have to be this hard. Well, I have no answers about why it is. I can speculate, but it doesn't really mean anything in the grand scheme of things. Whatever possible reasons we create as to why life has to be so impossibly miserable sometimes are really just our helpless human ramblings, our feeble attempts at making ourselves feel better.

We don't know whether it's all 'meant to be' or random, meaningless misery without a point. We don't know whether we choose this stuff before we get here or whether it's dumped on us by some Supreme Being who has decided it for us. We don't know if it's fate or free will or a little of both. We can guess, we can believe, but we do not really know.

And even if we did, would it change anything? Your life would still unfold as it's going to unfold, whatever that means, and however it happens. Hating it because it's hard, or being fed up and tired because it's nothing but struggle - none of that will change even if you get some Big Brilliant Flash of Awareness with a personal memo from the Divine Source of All.

You're still going to have to put one foot in front of the other and get through your life, one day at a time. Or one minute at a time, when it gets really bumpy.

So what are you going to do with those days? Those minutes? Do you really think that giving up on the harder parts of life will make the rest of it any better? Do you really think that if you look at your challenges and say, "I can't!  I quit!" that whatever comes after will be better than it is now?

I rather doubt it. Because I'll bet that whatever it is you're trying to do, whatever it is that you want to give up was designed to make the rest of your life better in some way. It would enhance, improve, or lead to something. Whether it's big or small, you wouldn't have been bothering if there wasn't going to be some benefit for you.

So why would you throw that away, unless you're absolutely certain that you've done all you can do, and that it is really and truly time to accept that you cannot do any more, and stop trying?

The bottom line is this:  If accepting the situation and stopping is best for you, if continuing means you're flogging a dead horse that will only prevent you from moving forward (and may, in fact, be detrimental to you) then do it. But if you just can't be bothered to try again, or if you're just tired, slow down. Take a rest.

Look at the situation. Forget the pieces you've lost and remember your remaining bishop, your rook, those few pawns. Remember your queen and how much power she wields. Then plot her next move.

And don't stop until it's the right thing to do.

 

Spiritual Arts Mentor and Master Teacher, Liberty Forrest, guides you in discovering who you are, why you’re here, and how to follow that path.

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